Is it just me or are old people just rude

[LittleMonster]

I live in a condo in a good neighborhood, but there are quite a few elderly residents in the community, definitely more than I'm used to from downtown toronto... anyway, twice now I've been pretty much harassed by crazy old people. I'm in my early 20's, pretty easy going and i think of myself being pretty tolerant of others but this is ridiculous.

The first time it happened was when I was putting away my recycling. this old person passed by yelling at me "hey what are you doing" "are you taking the bottles" etc etc. I was astonished, I wasn't dressed like a bum, I wasn't taking anything, i was just like WTF! I would never speak to someone like that. Even if a homeless person was taking things, so what, he's just gonna sell it to a recycling depot anyway... big deal

this morning I took my dog out for his walk. we came around the corner, where the grass is and my dog decided to poop. Now keep in mind this is the area belonging to all condo owners and it has no restrictions on dogs. Most dogs actually poop there everyday and I hardly ever see anyone leave without cleaning up. So I go ahead and take out the doggy bag to clean up and I start hearing this old lady. She had popped out from her window, on the 8th floor or so, yelling at me again "take your dog elsewhere" "havn't you heard of the park" "dont you have any brains" and it got funnier as time went on... I think she said something about kicking my ass. I couldn't stop laughing. "come up here young man so i can kick your ass". I was thinking i should go back at the same time tomorrow and tell my dog to go potty just to see her reaction.

I had a pretty rough time restraining myself that time, but I only told her that she could call whoever she wants and should just go back inside, then I walked away. I just wish I could have told her off but I know that wouldn't be the best way of going about it.

No offense, to the elderly I like chatting with them actually most of the time, but I just hate it when grumpy old people think they own the world just because they are the elderly. I respect everyone but it pisses me off when somebody, no matter what age, starts acting like a jerk like that.

has anyone else had similar experiences? What would you do if you were confronted like that?

[babymomma]

I volunteer at a nursing home.. It gets pretty rude at times.. lol.. I get called so many mean things, just because im trying to help.. I cant help but to laugh it off..

[BenMax]

I can't say that I have had a hard time from the elderly. However, when and if I am treated with disrespect from anyone (depends on the circumstances of course). I usually smile and tell them with all sincerity to have a wonderful day. They are usually left without much more to say but they realize that they look like total morons. Kindness goes far, especially to those that lack this wonderful traite.

I did however pretend once that I was deaf (sorry to anyone here who maybe hearing impaired - no offence intended). The people where left dumbfounded and really had nothing to add since I was smiling and making these hand gestures (who knows what I said - could have been up yours or something). My friend did everything in her power to not break out in total laughter as these people had no idea how to communicate....luckily she went along with me as we 'chatted' using our hands.

Don't let it bother you - a smile usually goes further than what they care to admit. - see it worked!

[14+kitties]

Treat a person with respect, you normally get respect back.
I am heading quickly to being one of those "old people". I am also in the service industry. I see all kinds. Most of my customers are the nicest people imaginable. I have also had the unfortunate experience of some very very rude ones. Guess what, in the majority they aren't old. The younger ones, 20 to 40ish, are the rudest.
I have also seen on many ocassions young people being rude to older people. Not holding doors for them, making the older ones move out of the way on sidewalks, cursing, etc. It's pretty sad.
Maybe if you try having a conversation with these people you may find they really aren't rude all the time. Maybe they are just reacting to the way they usually get treated by younger folks.
I agree with BenMax. Smile and tell them to have a nice day.

[LittleMonster]

yes, you're possibly right AG. but my problem is, I didn't even provoke any of them. They just come out yelling at me ill just put it to rest i guess.

[Jim Hall]

hey its probably the most fun they had all day


with old cranks ( and imone too at times} i just get sooo sweet and polite
and about half the time they react in a good way


lol comn up hereso i can kixk yur ass lol probaly coulnt make the stairs cause of the hip replacment

[glasslass]

Age has nothing to do with it. Rude young people eventually turn into ruder old people!

[EndOfFashion]

Glasslass, you are so right. I am going to be the MOST bitter old person, I can feel it!

LM, I hear ya. Even though people of all ages can be rude, I feel like rude old people love to target teens and us 20-somethings. Perhaps they have been disrespected by other adolescents, but honestly I hate being lumped into that "group" - I feel like I've been treated rudely by some elderly people simply because of my age.

And yes, 14+ - those 40-somethings can be downright nasty! For some reason 30- and 40-somethings seem to treat cashiers and retail employees badly...I always wonder how they would feel if it was their child on the other side of the counter, working their very first, thankless part-time job.

I agree that I will respect those who respect me, irregardless of age or perceived experience. (And that means respect everyone until they've given you a sound reason not to!)

[TacoGrl]

Funny...I was talking to my hair stylist today about this...do people get cranky when they get old, or are they cranky all their lives...

I think life makes them cranky. I also think there are a lot of cranky people out there whom eventually get old.

My condo has a lot of older people in it too...the board has actually tried to make it a 50+ building, but fortunately, they get defeated when they get reminded of the money in condo fees they will loose (seniors pay less). I get stares and some won't even get on the elevator with me...the ones that do, clutch their purses or whatever they are carrying and I think I look normal!

I always say hello...most of the time, I get one of those looks that says don't talk to me.

Some are nice though...there are some old guys here that are hilarious!

[Golden Girls]

The first time it happened was when I was putting away my recycling. this old person passed by yelling at me "hey what are you doing" "are you taking the bottles" etc etc.

So I go ahead and take out the doggy bag to clean up and I start hearing this old lady. She had popped out from her window, on the 8th floor or so, yelling at me again "take your dog elsewhere" "havn't you heard of the park" "dont you have any brains" and it got funnier as time went on... I think she said something about kicking my ass. I couldn't stop laughing. "come up here young man so i can kick your ass"

These two people sound bored but hilarious! Yelling down from the 8th floor LMAO must of been a commercial

has anyone else had similar experiences? What would you do if you were confronted like that?

yesterday I was giving my dog water sitting under a tree (public sidewalk) and a woman comes out of nowhere and starts yelling that she found dog poop on her lawn last week - I just looked at her and was thinking WTF just happened?

She just kept yelling where I ended up saying could you please just like go away ... I have no idea why I still get shocked by some people both young and old. You know the saying misery loves company pfft She even said she was going home to call the police - you do that, good plan

[chico2]

Well,I guess I am old,but not old-old
We have one older man who terrorizes people in the mall with his motorized chair(or whatever you call it)he loves to ride right up behind you and beep his horn,then he laughs his head off

I too worked with the public for many years,not easy,whatever age they are,there are rude young people,older people and very old people.
Just try to make sure you don't become one of them,they probably are very unhappy people,feel sorry for them instead

[BenMax]

[QUOTE=chico2;793063]Well,I guess I am old,but not old-old
We have one older man who terrorizes people in the mall with his motorized chair(or whatever you call it)he loves to ride right up behind you and beep his horn,then he laughs his head offQUOTE]


You see I actually would like a guy like that!

[quincymycat]

Originally Posted by glasslass

Age has nothing to do with it. Rude young people eventually turn into ruder old people!

Now this I agree with!!!
I am one of those "older" people, but just for the record...not too old!!!
I was brought up to be polite and never talk back...you know all the stuff you get taught in the 50's. I have to admit that sometimes I get a bit wary of approaching a group of young people - and here I refer to teens, especially when they are in a group - as in some cases there doesn't seem to be any fear of repercussions for any behaviour they may exhibit and when in a group it seems they want to out do everyone else. Perhaps it is paranoia.
As for older/younger people, you usually get what you give. Be polite to them and they will generally be polite back.
Now the old codgers, of which I count myself either being or sliding quickly into....I have always been polite, opening doors, excusing myself etc and usually do not encounter too many problems. It sometimes seem they are surprised to have common courtesy extended to them and this is not good. What does that say about city dwellers?
I do agree that there are the cranky ones - but age is not the only factor here.
I think someone said that perhaps it is the only fun they are having at this point in their lives...who knows.
Just treat everyone like you want to be treated and hope for the best. If someone is going out of their way to be miserable, there is not much you can do. Just like with some younger kids, some older people sometimes exhibit an "entitlement" attitude too, except they feel they made it to that point in their lives and figure they deserve everyone to bow down to them. NOT LIKELY, but since you can't press an ignore button, just smile pleasantly like you are brain addled and let them think they have bested you. It will likely be the high point of their week and just think of the stories they can tell later!

[EndOfFashion]

Originally Posted by quincymycat

I have to admit that sometimes I get a bit wary of approaching a group of young people - and here I refer to teens, especially when they are in a group - as in some cases there doesn't seem to be any fear of repercussions for any behaviour they may exhibit and when in a group it seems they want to out do everyone else. Perhaps it is paranoia.

It is paranoia. The group most targeted by youth crime/violence is other youths. Young males (teens to early/mid-20s) are most likely to be victims of crime - i.e. shootings, stabbings, assaults. In fact, the elderly are at the bottom of this list!

[BenMax]

I am in my forties and I would avoid the teens more so than a group of elderly people - call me paranoid I guess. Seriously - even though I have a teen, a group of them - I rather avoid just in case - you never know.

[EndOfFashion]

Originally Posted by BenMax

I am in my forties and I would avoid the teens more so than a group of elderly people - call me paranoid I guess. Seriously - even though I have a teen, a group of them - I rather avoid just in case - you never know.

LOL a group of elderly people...I just pictured a gang of elderly people hanging out on the corner outside a convenience store or something. That's too funny!

I remember when I was a kid, I used to cross the street to avoid walking past a group of teens. But seriously, they normally target members of their own demographic.

[TacoGrl]

Originally Posted by BenMax

I am in my forties and I would avoid the teens more so than a group of elderly people - call me paranoid I guess. Seriously - even though I have a teen, a group of them - I rather avoid just in case - you never know.

I too laughed at the "group of elderly people"!

It makes me think of the Legion by where I live...if you don't time it right and drive by there as they are leaving, they just shoot out of the parking lot not caring about stopping or the other cars on the road...they will flip you the bird if you honk...it's quite funny to watch...from a distance.

[babymomma]

Old people and young people have a different kind of rude... Ive never had a 20 year old come up and say blunty, that i am fat. I have however, had many old people do it. I havent met one that didnt nit pick everybodies appearance in a very blunt and very RUDE manor.. Pfft, My hair does NOT look like a horse's tail! (Sorry, just puttin that out there.)...


Quite frankly (No offence intended really) Alot of old people, seem to have no boundaries. I dont think its appropriate (And yes, it is extremly rude and uncomfortable) For a 80 year old man to sit down in his chair which i am standing next to and wrap his arm around my leg.. Okay, if he doesnt know the difference, well why cant somebody explain to him that it is innappropriate.

[EndOfFashion]

LOL babymomma, it's so true. Older people can be rather direct about things like that when speaking to "youths" - I think maybe it's because they believe they're speaking from "experience" and doing us a "favour"? I know people who allow themselves to say hurtful things under the guise of being "honest" (those are the people who say things like "I'm just being straightforward, you're too sensitive") - and no, not just the elderly. I have 30-something year old aunts/uncles like that.

My grandmother used to tell me frequently that my butt is too big. The first time she said that to me, I was 12! In fact, both my grandparents often harass my mom because of her weight. It's downright insensitive (but that might be a family thing as opposed to an age thing).

It irks me that they feel they can tear apart our appearance because current trends are simply different from what was acceptable when they were growing up. I mean, yeesh, the Victorians would faint if they saw what we were wearing today, but does that mean we should all start wearing petticoats, crinolines and cages again? Um...no.

[EndOfFashion]

Originally Posted by TacoGrl

It makes me think of the Legion by where I live...if you don't time it right and drive by there as they are leaving, they just shoot out of the parking lot not caring about stopping or the other cars on the road...they will flip you the bird if you honk...it's quite funny to watch...from a distance.

HAHA that's hilarious! Man there are some BAD drivers out there. Yes, many of them are old. I'm shocked how rude some of those old ladies are behind the wheel - I've definitely been flipped off by a granny before, too. Of course, young males are probably the worst drivers...like my younger brother.

[chico2]

EoF,there I beg to differ,yes,old people often are slow drivers,that drive me up the wall,but I am more worried about young drivers,Honda-Holics.(no offence meant to Honda-owners in general)whipping in and out of traffic with a phone in their ear.
It seems to me they think they are invinsible,toying with their own and other peoples lives.
16yrs old is waaaay to young to drive.IMO

[babymomma]

Originally Posted by chico2

16yrs old is waaaay to young to drive.IMO

Ahem... Chico2. Most 16 year old drivers are much much much more cautous then most 30 year olds and up. Seriously, I have yet to see a 16 year old Young driver to do anything reckless. Because 16 year olds still have to drive with an adult in the vehicle.

[chico2]

Well,I don't really know how the laws have changed since my boys were 16,so maybe I should just say young men instead.

[EndOfFashion]

Originally Posted by chico2

EoF,there I beg to differ,yes,old people often are slow drivers,that drive me up the wall,but I am more worried about young drivers,Honda-Holics.(no offence meant to Honda-owners in general)whipping in and out of traffic with a phone in their ear.
It seems to me they think they are invinsible,toying with their own and other peoples lives.
16yrs old is waaaay to young to drive.IMO

Yes, sometimes old people drive waaay too slow (which, by the way, can be very dangerous). But I've seen some that are just careless. They can be terrible in parking lots, as they make turns without looking to their right and left - that's happened to me many many times. Of course, it's not always the elderly, but I do sometimes fear that they're not as aware of their surroundings as other drivers.

I've been cut off by people who looked to be in their 70s! And twice in the last month I've seen elderly drivers run a red light The scary thing was that they didn't even seem to realize they did it. I wouldn't make up a 70-something year old granny flipping me off - this happened just after she cut me off. Unbelievable.

BTW, I did say that young males tend to be the worst drivers, so actually I'm not sure what you're disagreeing with! I just said there are bad drivers out there, and many are old (not all). Suffice it to say, there are some idiots on Canadian roads.

FYI - I drive a Honda Civic. lol.

[BenMax]

If elderly people are rude, obnoxious or flipant - I can understand their frustrations and that some may be stuck in their ways. As for the younger generation - sorry - that I don't accept at all.

The seniors have done their time, have seen the world change quickly, experienced the depression, war, disasters, child rearing and everything else. As for the youth they don't really have the right to be rude. For those of us bringing up today's youths are really to blame.

Really I say forgive the elderly. I rather enjoy their grumpy mannorism - they earned it.

(oh I can feel the 'quoting' happening....).

[Frenchy]

Originally Posted by LittleMonster

has anyone else had similar experiences? What would you do if you were confronted like that?

I did but with a bit*** , not an elderly person .... I just showed her the full poop bag I was holding in my hands and ask if I could empty it on her front step so she can see that I wasn't carrying strawberries in there ....

I now live in the boonies , nobody to piss me off here

Originally Posted by chico2

We have one older man who terrorizes people in the mall with his motorized chair(or whatever you call it)he loves to ride right up behind you and beep his horn,then he laughs his head off

omg that will soooo be me later !!! even if I can walk , I will get one of those , and will put a turbo in the motor so it runs faster. The horn will be the loudest thing you'll ever heard too. I will also scream : get out of the way people , retired woman coming through .....

[EndOfFashion]

I don't think anyone is trying to make excuses for the younger generations, BenMax. But I certainly don't agree that seniors have the right to be rude, just because they're seniors. If they're going to use the "experience" excuse, then how can anyone say that young people have no right to be rude? As some may be living with alcoholics for parents, or may have had to fight cancer at a young age, etc. etc. Youth are not free from negative experiences. I know some 20-somethings who have gone through more than perhaps some seniors (although yes, I understand that is generally the exception to the rule). Giving seniors such allowances, but holding youths responsible for such behaviour (and suggesting it is a personality thing rather than an "experience" thing) is not fair. It's fundamental attribution error.

Okay, basically, I don't think there are many circumstances that give anyone the right to be rude. Let's all respect each other first, until we are given a very solid reason not to. Everyone has the capability to be rude and of course there are rude people across generations, genders and races. I think the OP's point was perhaps that the elderly tend to be ruder to teens and 20-somethings, and I can agree with that to some extent. But I am definitely not arguing that elderly people are ruder than other groups, or anything like that!

Let's all love each other, m'kay?

[chico2]

EOF,I failed to read you last bitin your post.
I think,the way things are today,some youths and I say some,not all,have not learned to respect others and I believe many seniors today are afraid of young people,especially young men.
There are shootings,stabbings and muggings every day in the paper,I have to admit,if I walk by a group of young men,I will hold on a little tighter to my purse.
I honestly don't think I've ever been rude to a stranger,be they young or old,the only time I would blow is if I see any kind of abuse,be it to a child or an animal,otherwise I don't sweat the small stuff,life is too short

[quincymycat]

HAD to put in my 2 cents for the comments about drivers. Any time you don't see a head over the head rest in a car WORRY!
I don't know about age being a HUGE factor in driving any more than in rudeness. Granted, with experience comes knowledge, but, I have to add a little story about my 30 year old daughter driving on the 407. She drove INTO the back of a panel van who had his cruise control on because she was gabbing on her cell phone. This happens and she wonders why her insurance company refused to insure her.
Really, cell phones are a real danger while driving and all ages are capable of this problem from the newly minted teen driver to the mature business person just trying to get the last bit of time into a deal.
Personally, I avoid the highways because I know my limitations and this has nothing to do with my age, but I am just plain nervous and would likely be a liability to others on the road. Too bad everyone doesn't think like this.

[chico2]

QMC,oh,oh lets not get talking about cell-phones and drivers
Our Chicken@#^*of a premier(McGuinty),does not have the courage to ban talking on the phone and driving,while it's been proven time and again how dangerous it is.

I have seen vans full of kids and a mother on the phone several times,no wonder all kids have to be in child-seats