Quote:
Originally Posted by Bailey_
I have to say Equla, I really appreciated this comment.
I'm currently going through a divorce and we have a 21 month old daughter. It's been incredibly difficult, and often times I have asked myself how this is all going to affect her future.
I have an amazing amount of support about my decision to finally leave, but I came from a family where my parents are still happily married to this day. It wasn't until this all happened that my Mom and Dad told me on seperate occasions that my Dad had an affair on my Mom when I was my daughters age and my Mom was pregnant with my brother. It was their way of telling me that if you try hard enough, you can work through the most impossible situations in a marriage.
It's made me question many times if I could potentially also forgive my husband and live a happy, fufilled life with him as my parents both have with eachother.
But I also know that I am much different person than my Mother - and on that basis I feel like I've made the best decision possible for my daughter and myself at this time.
So yes. I agree with your comment 100%.
|
I believe that if you can't handle a relationship, it only makes all parties worse for the wear. The children will suffer. If you have the strength to stay together and either work it out, or at the least be able to function, then even better. But a life of arguing and resentment is not healthy for a child.
Children learn by example. If they see Mommy and Daddy constantly fighting, they will grow up to believe that is the way a marriage is. Here's a great poem...
Children Learn What They Live
By Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D.
If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.
If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.
If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.
If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.
If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.
If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.
If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.
If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.
If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.
If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.
If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.
If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.
If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.
If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.
If children live with honesty, they learn truthfulness.
If children live with fairness, they learn justice.
If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.
If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.
If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live.